;;running on empty

[MukLuk]

Fizzing hot white bulbs of energy shot through her, coursed through her veins, setting her on fire. Her nerves ached. Every sense was hypersensitive. She knew by tomorrow she would swear that she would never do coke again but she always did. She stared at the bedroom ceiling, shards of broken mirrors decorating the once empty space and letting her see into her broken self. But the bed was too hot. She couldn’t stand it. So she rose and walked into the kitchen, collapsing onto the floor and bringing the table down with her. Whatever dishes had been on it shattered on the floor and she felt cuts peppering her skin, blood sliding from her onto the linoleum below. She couldn’t bring herself to care. Everything was so bright right now that it hurt to exist.

She closed her eyes to the world but it entered her ears, every sound painfully amplified. The humming of the refrigerator reverberated in her bones. Thunder outside resulting from her bad mood made her wince as her eardrums seemed fit to burst with every peal. Finally she picked her head up enough to throw up a clean distance away from herself.

A man was there, then, stroking her face. “Acid dreams make me dream of acid.” He whispered. Her eyes were closed and all of the noise was gone. “Acid dreams make me dream of acid.” It was a woman this time, young. Then hordes of people were whispering it and moaning it and shouting it and screaming it and she was curled up on the floor, hands over her ears. “Shut up…” She moaned. “Go away…” And then she opened her eyes and there was nothing there. Only her infuriatingly empty house. Burnt marks sketched out her body upon the floor where she had apparently charred it. She rose up on unsteady feet and grabbed the nearest dishes in her hands. “Fuck you.” She snarled to the ugly china works and sent them clattering into the wall, bursting into conflagrations of white and blue and various other artful colors.

She fell back to the ground, leaning against her refrigerator, willing the cold to enter her body and freeze her from the inside. But fate wasn’t the type to give her what she truly wanted.

She dragged herself with her elbows through forests of glass shards, each holding her soul in a different angle, each taking their blood with her, and she managed to make it almost to the front door before she gave up.

Life was so unfair.